Week 35: Melons... Inappropriate

The baby apparently has 'not much room to maneuver' now that its over 18 inches and 5.25lbs. I beg to differ. It should read, 'the baby makes room to maneuver, which you will feel in between your ribs, on top of your bladder, and even into your back.' If I sit down for more than 2 minutes, as soon as I stand I feel like someone is punching my bladder that feels full (even though I most likely peed 5 minutes earlier). The same things happen if I stand for 2 minutes then try to sit down. Maybe the message is to keep moving since the poundage that is piling on way exceeds the baby's 5.25lb honeydew.

foodsubs.com

Matt got tazey crazy (warning: inappropriate video link) this past week and had to be tazed at work to become certified to use a taser himself. That was a little nerve-wracking, as I thought of the million things that could go wrong (me and electrocution don’t mix…remember when I shocked myself and thought I toasted the baby?? Shocker Blog). Fortunately, Matt walked away with 2 welts/bruises and most of his pride (he didn’t scream like a girl or pee in front of his superiors). 

This past weekend, Matt's sister hosted a couple's shower for us. During arts & crafts, the party guests decorated onesies, bibs and socks for our little melon. I'm not sure how many will actually be worn based on the level of appropriateness, but you be the judge.

One of my favorite gifts was from some friends who couldn't make it to the party. Not only do I love getting mail (and this was shipped to our house), but I was laughing out loud when I read the cover. 

If you knew the giver, you would know its so Miranda. Shout out Pat Tefft... he asked, "Is this an appropriate children's book?" I'd say it is until some reading comprehension sinks in. I can just imagine us, oblivious to what our kid is comprehending, hearing "Walter, go the f**k to sleep!" Kids say the darndest things!

When are the Engelkamp's babysitting?

My other favorite gift was from Miss Betsy.

MAJOR update to the crunch coat blog, you can ask to purchase a little cup of it on its own... to take home and enjoy by the spoonful (for a bonus price of less than $1). Are you kidding me?!?! Wonderful news. Matt and I also greatly appreciated all of the functional baby gifts and support from our friends. I think some of the boys were baffled by the 'shower' thing and wondered why the heck girls think those things are necessary (Matt fell into this group) but hopefully everyone had a great time!

I forgot to mention that at my last doctor's appointment, my doctor said that I was 'good at having babies' (even though I technically haven't had one yet). Although I think this is great news, Matt would probably file this in the inappropriate category. It all goes back to the office I go to and the fact that I am a non-typical patient there, but my lack of 'issues' is a blessing and a relief for us and for my doctor.

Last but not least, Baby Melon's first friend is a GIRL! Maxine Peterson has lady parts!!