Week 29: Writer's Blogk

I have nothing fun to talk about and my baby development resources are not helping the situation. Just to keep with the trend, I’ll let you know that the baby weighs about 2.5lbs, the weight of a butternut squash and is just over 15 inches.

eatingbender.com

(Mind out of gutter, please) The bones are soaking up crazy amounts of calcium so I need to bump up my intake. Dairy seems more enjoyable than squash. Ice Cream counts right? I like anything that includes cheese too (haha oh dairy, oh Rocket...). I’m getting bigger, my back is hurting and I have a new fear of hemorrhoids but other than that, no other new news on the baby front.

I read Jenny McCarthy’s book, Belly Laughs (thanks again Court) and the biggest laugh I got was that every chapter spoke to me.

babymommablog.com

I’m glad I waited until I was ‘more pregnant’ to read the book and could fully appreciate the nightmares she describes. It is definitely one for Matt to read too a) so he understand I am not a freak of nature b) so he can appreciate my symptoms and issues being less severe than they could be and c) so he can envision a babe like Jenny McCarthy doing weird stuff like being constipated (the chapter is called ‘Passing Stonehenge’), farting (Did a Sewer Tank Explode, or Did You Just Fart?), leaking (Niagra in My Pants), pooping on the delivery table, having varicose veins and hemorrhoids (which she didn’t have but described vividly)~ all making his wife seem more appealing than a Playboy Playmate. Thanks Jenny! Other less gross chapters I enjoyed included...

Holy Shit! I Think I Hard-Boiled My Baby! (Taking Hot Baths)

Granny Panties (Letting Go of the G-Strings)

Where the Hell Can I Find a Muumuu? (Nothing to Wear)

What the FU*K Are These? (Stretch Marks)

Another chapter that made me laugh was on vivid baby dreams (Freddy Kruger Ain’t Got Nothin’ On Me). Jenny had a reoccurring dream of performing her own C-section, pulling the baby out, playing with him for a while, shoving him back in, and stitching herself back up. I mentioned pulling the baby out in my own dream a few posts back (Pickles) and its funny to think that my dream was a ‘normal’ pregnancy thing (if comparing myself to Jenny McCarthy is ‘normal’). Jenny has a Chelsea Handler-esque quality to her writing (but not quite as funny) making the book a quick and easy read. Preggos- check it out, but I recommend waiting until you at least have a bump and have felt kicks. The longer you hold off, the more you will appreciate the amusing outlook on your weird pregnancy issues.

In Nursery News… I’m still an undecided mess.

That is a crappy cell phone image that doesn’t do the colors justice but you can see there are 6 colors on the wall. (I can count, one of the blues is a duplicate). The stinkin’ pink is soooo distracting and I can’t get a true idea of what the colors would look like! I have NEVER bought samples before (I’m usually a pretty impulsive buyer) but this paint is going to be the death of me. For the record, I don’t like any of the 6 colors. Boy do I love square 1. Matt and I did buy a chair last night though, and part of the reason I pulled the trigger was to force some paint decisions. My vision is being narrowed down and I think we are close to making major progress (still waiting on the wall repairs, cough, cough).

Finally, this 29^th week will be spent a little more chaotic than usual. Since Gus & Wiggy have been getting a lot of blog time the past few weeks, I thought I’d share a picture of their houseguest for the week. We are dog-sitting Gus’s half-sister, Annie (they have the same Dad… or Mom, I forget) until Monday so my boys are getting some girl-time.

They look well-behaved (Walter looks dead) but in the first 4 hours of being together, we already had a minor issue (don’t worry N&T- Happy Vacation!). Hopefully it wasn’t a sign of what’s to come and we have a happy weekend! Maybe we can get them to use their new baby pool!

I guess my writer’s blogk churned out a little more info than I expected. Good thing I read a book last week! I’m excited for next week to get out of the ‘twenties’ (I won’t be saying that in reference to my age in a couple of years) and I’m guessing this last stretch will lead to better content (i.e. more uncomfortable pregnancy situations) to blog about. With that, these twenties are ‘squashed’! hahahahahahaha! Get it??